a jam on jism

Apparently, I’m currently fixated with bukake. It’s a fixation of which I was unaware until I finished up my most recent Penthouse article, the one that you all helped me write. For in the process of explaining ways for the average Penthouse reader to ask his female lover for the low-down dirty-sexy-fun things he wants but doesn’t know how to request, I must have used the example of spooge play at least four times.

In a 2,000-word article, four uses of bukake equals a fixation. Or if not a fixation, at least a profound interest that has moved beyond being merely idle.

I have previously admitted my affection for the spurt. Spooge is the party favor of sex; Martha Stewart must love spooge. It’s festive to have my chest or belly decorated with jism. I like the smell and the feel and occasionally the taste, though I admit the abstract visual brings me more pleasure than the concrete reality of its taste. Psychologists say that kids acquire the ability to be grossed out at about the age of six—something they’ve proven by giving kids a glass of milk with a bug in it; those six or older still refuse to drink the milk once the bug has been removed; those under six don’t. I must have reached my adult revulsion age at some point in the last ten years because while I used to be able to lick come off my lover’s fingers with relish, I no longer can do it without squinching my nose in a little moue of disgust.

Of course, I still do it. I just register disapproval now.

Bukake. Pearl necklace. Facial. Cum shot. Call it what you will, a blast of semen will still be as sweet. Or it will be in the abstract, for, as you know, I’m not getting any currently and that’s frankly fine by me.

The picture to the left is from Wikipedia. It pretty much epitomizes Wikipedia’s staunch commitment to present sex completely stripped of any pleasure. According to Wikipedia, I should feel badly about my cum-hither fantasy. Wikipedia says this about bukake:

Some feminists have described bukkake as a fetish culture beyond sex. Others…claim that bukkake is symbolic group rape, and its primary purpose is the humiliation, degradation and objectification of women…It has also been called a "ritualized humiliation of someone who evokes resentment" and an expression of male loss of control due to the reality of increasing gender equality.

They cite a couple of writers to back their argument up. Similarly, Jezebel, the pop arbiters of all things feminist, just responds to facials with a single syllable: “Ew.” And then they imply that any woman who desires a pearl necklace or its metaphorical cousins has been co-opted by porn. As I’ve said before, I have profound issues with Jezebel’s monosyllabic pronouncement; I'm a feminist, and I do enjoy the pearl necklace.

Wikipedia and Jezebel’s responses are funny for me on a couple of counts. First of all, I don’t really watch porn. I don’t get it. Admittedly, sometimes I’ll stumble across a short clip that can briefly hold my interest, but mostly I find it boring, and my mind starts wandering as I watch it. I end up wondering about the people I’m watching. What they had for lunch. Or what they wanted to be when they were little. Or what’s on their Amazon Wish List. It’s not that I’m not a visual person, for my desire for spurt is very much tied up with my scopic pleasure; rather, it’s that I’m a narrative person. Porn narrative is a bit empty for me.

When I imagine being the tasty cookie in a circle jerk—and I do—I've a feeling far from being humiliated. And I am quite open to fantasies of humiliation. I love it when they call me names, both in my dreams and in real life, and I often have had fantasies where I’m being paraded or watched in a nakedly humiliating manner. But in stark contrast to my myriad fantasies of humiliation, when  I imagine being festooned with jism, I feel honored.

I feel like the belle at the ball, both responsible for the pleasure of the men surrounding me, wanking in V-6 piston-pumping order, and I feel like I’m the center of attention. As such, I have a place of high esteem, however physically lower, and that the imagined ribbons of semen are the confetti at my parade.

But, of course, this is all fantasy. I don’t know how I’d feel in real life, which is currently far more unstable than the inside of my head.  I imagine that my current fixation with the cum shot has to do with boiling the sex experience down to its most essential component—visible pleasure. Still healing in the wake of a break-up, I can’t yet wrap my head around the whole man; hell, I can’t even wrap my mind around a body part. But the spurt, that I can hold in my head. If not between my breasts. Or around my throat. Or perhaps on the cleft of my ass. Anywhere, really, as long as it’s fantasy.

Comments

[Mrs. Hall]

I can't help but be irritated with the 'feminist' take on jism and the facial aspect of it. I mean, this is where one half of all life begins. It is a miracle onto itself. Why not get all jazzed about jizz?

[Caliban]

As a man, I'm not sure my opinion counts here, but I always imagined the recipient would feel more worshipped than humiliated.

[Meggy]

I am a Feminist and I have strong feelings about anything regarding force, coercion, sense of obligation etc.

It took me a long time to work out what Andrea Dworkin meant by saying 'all men are rapists', because I thought she meant that ultimately all men are so governed by their dick it is likely that they will one day end up forcing someone. It's only fairly recently that I learnt that she meant that the sheer act of penetration is, by definition, rape.

And that's where I have serious problems. It's easy to analyse various actions, sexual or otherwise, in a purely abstract context, without considering human feelings, the essence of what makes us people, or in this context women. My contention is that any woman (and indeed any man) can do what ever she wants sexually as long as it's adult and consenting. I happen to like pearl necklaces etc, and fantasise about being the object of a group bukkake - although I would never contemplate it in practice. I contend that as a Feminist, I am entitled to do whatever I want to do, if it gives me pleasure. But I also contend that in the context of a loving and consenting relationship, I will also occasionally do things I don't especially like, and that counts for non-sexual things, too - it isn't anti-Feminist to be civil to my partner's acquaintances even though they're boring as hell, so why should it be anti-Feminist occasionally to do something to please him in bed. My view would switch if he insisted on it, rather than it being something I freely give of my own choice.

He doesn't like spanking me, even though I love it, because it goes totally against his grain to hit women. Figure out the Feminist interpretation of that one

[puppygrrrl]

While I've never had more than two guys cum on me at once, it is something I fantasize about: being at the center of a bukkake party. Part of it is humiliating: a dozen guys spill their cum on my face. Part of it is also deeply flattering: a dozen guys want me! Maybe one of these days I'll be lucky enough to experience this. If so I'll let you know how it went!

[Tom]

Never participated, not sure it would be all that much fun to wait in line or to perform while the other gents watched. Humiliation would be reserved for the guy who failed to deliver...

It's interesting that "feminism" has become the new puritanism for some folks. After decades of progress opening up sexuality did we ever expect people to say "Oh, I can't do that, I'm a [fill in blank]." Not sure the feminists or others have a code of conduct that precludes certain sexual acts. Not sure I want to be associated with anyone who does...

[uppitylittleslut]

The first time I got jiz on my face it was an accident and the guy started apologizing, but I was surprised by how much I liked it - I was like "No! Don't stop! More!" His cum was so hot and wet, and having it splash right across my face was - it was like running through orgasm sprinklers! I was literally immersed in my partner's pleasure and the experience left me feeling very connected to him. I didn't feel "dirty" or denigrated at all, I felt *anointed*!

Just gotta watch out for your eyes though - yeowch!

[Sean]

I think you are looking at it from your own self-centered female perspective. Cum is not something that a straight male desires. Most men aren't even willing to taste their own cum. Quite to the contrary, it's something they want to get rid of. It's a feeling that's born out of our carnal desire to eject those fluids that have trapped our bodies and minds. Most men could relate to the feeling of revulsion they feel toward their ejaculate right after their orgasm. I don't think that feeling has anything to do with sex negative upbringing. Male chimps exhibit the same reaction toward their ejaculate. I think it's something that's coded in our brains. So, put two and two together, I definitely believe there is a strong element of causing humiliation for those men who desire to engage in that type of sexual activity.

[chelsea g]

Gosh, Sean. I guess you're right. I shouldn't look at my own experience in that "self-centered female perspective"; I should defer to the default position of absolute correctness, that of the man's. After all, it's his homunculum spread like maple butter all over my sternum.

Silly me. Thank you so much for correcting my misguided views.

chelsea g.

[Sean]

Chelsea, that came out wrong. I didn't mean self-centered as in narcissistic. A better choice of word would have been isolated. You perceive your own reality. There is nothing wrong with. My point was that what you perceive isn't necessarily what they intend, but if your perception is satisfying to you then by all means indulge yourself. No one can take that away from you.

[The Fury]

Also not sure my opinion much matters here, but...

I applaud your backing in the male orgasm experience and the outcome of it. I would no doubt enjoy being squirted on by a woman. To know you've created so much pleasure has got to be empowering. I have been in a position where a woman has begged me to cum all over her and then in different circumstances the same woman feeling demeaned that I exploded healthily on her ass after sex. Isn't that what being a feminist is about? Having the right to choose your destiny?

If you ever need bukkake participants...ehh who am I kidding. I don't enjoy seeing other men's splooge like you do. LOL Great post

[Aki]

The only time I disliked having jizz on my face was when it was my fiancee shot it up my nose my accident. I personally like having being spouted on and the actions that lead up to it, especially if it involves having it rubbed against my neck, chest, or face.