my private njoy

The packaging itself tells you these toys are different. A hinged black box wrapped in a serene strip of white paper, the packaging promises the combined joyous mystery of both a Tiffany’s and an iPod box. You are seduced by the box, in short, before you even see the toy.

You tenderly slide off its demure white band, you prise the two black halves apart with your fingernails, you open the box with your fingertips, and then, only then, you finally see the toy nestled in its bordello-red satin clamshell halves; it is a thing of beauty. It’s a multi-step disrobing, like undressing a Victorian virgin, and it’s a pleasure.

Njoy toys were designed by a mechanical engineer, and they have all of the aeronautic, ergonomic, and pragmatic essence you would expect of something designed within a centimeter of its infinitely long life. But these solid, molded stainless steel toys were also designed by a man who clearly has a sybaritic imagination, for they are not merely functional; they are fucking sexy as hell.

Stainless steel does not, for me at least, conjure up visions of erotic excess. I don’t swoon over medical implements, for example. I’ve never had a naughty nurse or dirty doctor fantasy. I have often appreciated the aesthetics of stainless steel, in a modernist utopian kind of way; stainless steel appliances—Viking ranges or 1930’s toasters, for instance—have a beautiful and sensual sheen. But aside from wanting to rub my cheek against them, I’ve never been compelled to get hot and bothered over steel.

Njoy toys, though, have changed that. I now get naughty-sweaty thoughts over stainless steel, at least when embodied in these heavily erotic forms. Think about it: think about the alien velvety smoothness of steel. Consider for a moment how hard it is. Imagine for a moment how easy the transfer of heat, how low the friction, how heavy the metal in your hand, your pussy, your ass.

Njoy currently makes three styles of toys: two kinds of wands and a butt plug that comes in three sizes. The owner of the company, Greg, read my writing and offered to send me some products to see if I liked them (he also sent them to Always Aroused Girl. He’s very generous. She’s very orgasmic. You can read her experiences here and here.), and I can say, yes, Greg, I like them quite a lot.

I first took just the Fun Wand to bed with me. My libido has been hovering somewhere around Antarctic latitudes, what with all the emo maelstrom of late, and I’ve been feeling really reluctant about masturbating or sex or anything, really, but grudgingly I decided to take the toy for a test ride.

Lying on my back, touching my clit, I realized I was a lot more frisky-feeling than I’d previously noticed. Soon I was all kinds of drippy and feeling rather twitchy in the girl folds. I took the very heavy wand and inserted the ball end into my pussy. It felt cold, at first, but it very rapidly warmed to my body temperature. It also felt very heavy, and very hard.

While rubbing my clit with my right hand, I concentrated on rubbing my g-spot with the wand’s ball with my left. The beads on the other end of the wand helped me to hold the wand carefully and I noticed that the curve of the wand was pretty perfect in terms of both hitting the right joyplaces and in terms of making it easy to multi-task.

Concentrating on clenching and pressing my pussy against the ball, I also gently tugged the ball against my walls, and this internal massage made my orgasm quickly loom before me, like a giant pleasure fjord. I didn’t want to come too quickly, so I inserted the wand as far as it would go. Immediately I noticed that while the part of the wand that had been in me was warm, but the part that hadn’t remained room temperature, and I experienced the not-unpleasant shock of the cold wand against my outer lips.

Drifting in this warm red pre-orgasmic sea, I tried to find that Zen float of being justthisside of coming, tried to hold on by not holding, tried to stay without trying, lay there awash in this pleasure tide, let it lap over me, rolling with that tide and trying to surf its crest as long as possible, and failed as it crashed over me, making me grunt inarticulately with the warmyumminess of it all.

I then roused myself from bed and inserted Njoy’s medium-sized buttplug. Buttplugs, in general, are ugly things. They are functional, they are pleasurable, but they are not pretty. Njoy’s buttplug is flipping gorgeous. It fits incredibly well—so many butt toys seem like they were designed by people without assholes—but with its little art-deco handle and bulbous head, the Njoy buttplug is actually cute. Moreover, the handle fits neatly between your buttcheeks, and it provides a really easy way to toggle the toy, if you have more than two hands, which I regrettably do not.

I made myself come again with both the plug and the wand in me, like the greedy little buttslut that I am. The weight of the plug, its hardness and its glidiness make it a really lovely thing to have up my ass. I am really looking forward to playing with this toy when I’m with another person, and not just on my onesy.

My only complaint is that the plug isn’t big enough. Of course, I am kind of a size queen, and were this plug as big as I want, it would probably weigh a few pounds (the one I have probably weighs around a pound, and it’s a fairly small butt plug). I imagine this plug would be excellent for a butt beginner  or for people who want to fuck or be fucked while wearing a toy. It’s just a wee weeny for me.

Njoy toys are gorgeous. Nothing about them screams cheesy Vegas hyper-implanted porn-star marital aid. Everything about them positively murmurs real toys for adults who really want to enjoy their bodies. If you like really big toys, or toys with moving parts, this line of toys is not for you. If, however, you like a toy that is delightfully hard, that is sinfully easy to clean, that could be willed to your favorite grandchild, that warms and cools easily, and that is simply beautiful, this line of toys has your name spelled out in giant stainless steel letters.

Thank you, Greg. I look forward to Njoying a long life of screaming fjord orgasms because of you.

Comments

[Karl Elvis]

"like the greedy little buttslut that I am"

I think I love you, ChelseaGirl. B^)

[ravenna]

OH MY GOD those are beautiful! (I peeked at the wetsite, sorry, *website*.) Where do I sign up to be a product tester for this company?! I'd have to get my owner's permission, of course, but when I showed him the shiny stainless buttplugs his eyes went very wide, nearly as wide as my cute little rosebud will when he slides one up my asssssss OOOH I want one NOW! Thank you CG, you just rewrote Page One of my anniversary present wishlist... *kisses!*

[alwaysarousedgirl]

I agree with everything that you said about the qualities of these toys. Stainless steel rocks.

Glad you had so much fun Chelsea Girl.

If you are ever in my neck of the woods, let's get our toys together for a play-date, shall we?

[Autumn]

I, being a happy little kitchen wench, rather drool over stainless steel. I am now thinking mmmmm I want one of these.

[liese]

i'm going to NYC for a week in may.. any suggestions for things i should absolutely not miss while i'm there?

[ell]

Nice review CG. :) Never fear, one of the lovely things about direct access to the clever designer of such delightful pleasure instruments is the opportunity to influence the design of the next range...- bigger is almost always best, and heck, if it means reworking the entire manufacturing process for the benefit of size queens everywhere - so be it! :)

Cheers,
Ell

[Stan]

Did you ever try this one?

http://www.stockroom.com/In-The-Pink-Crystal-Probe-P112.aspx

It was just about the best $20 we ever spent...

[cordite]

A bigger njoy plug would be really nice!

[funes]

Thank you.

As a Virgo and physicist in a former life, I love toys and I have the very good fortune to see someone who really loves toys for different reasons altogether. She likes for me to drop by, blindfold her, tie her down, and when she is ready to start, she invariably asks in the most wonderful breathless voice filled with longing and dread, "Have you brought any new toys?" "Always" I answer (for I am no idiot) and I then proceed to use one toy after another on her until she begs me to stop, which I have been instructed to ignore, and continue until we need recharge all the batteries. As you might imagine, I'm *always* looking for new toys.

I've seen the nJoy toys and while I am attracted to them personally, I am embarrassed to say I don't understand how they "work". I mean, I understand how they worked for you, but would they work for someone like the lady I know? The inner engineer is looking for the manual for what is otherwise an exquisite piece of erotic art.

I'm getting her a battery charger for Christmas. http://www.thomas-distributing.com/maha-mh-c808m-battery-charger.htm